Jun 16 2023

Homelands Part 2

     Everyone is born somewhere. Well, today at least; that might change if we ever become a spacefaring species. But for the moment, each of us has a birthplace in some Earthly land. The majority of us live our whole lives in that land, vacations and business trips notwithstanding.

     Some striking fiction has been written about persons transported away from everything they’ve known. Stranger in a Strange Land is one of the best-known examples of that kind of fiction. For all its flaws – most of them due to the author’s determination to be an iconoclast – it does portray some of the struggles a man would face after being torn from his homeland. Unfortunately, Valentine Michael Smith isn’t a good specimen for an in-depth study of such a thing. Shevek, from Ursula Le Guin’s masterpiece The Dispossessed, serves better, despite the relatively compressed nature of his experiences on Urras, away from his birthland Anarres.

     I haven’t tried my hand at the task. Until recently, I’ve preferred narrative environments with which I’m familiar. (Yes, even in the Spooner Federation novels.) But I find the subject fascinating for more than one reason.

     There’s a word, anomie, which expresses a particular malaise: the sense of alienation deriving from purposelessness or rootlessness. The malady is more common today than ever before. I’ve read few assessments of the causes.

     Might one of them be our unprecedented mobility?

***

     I’m a New Yorker. I was born in the Bronx. I matured in Rockland County, which is just across a couple of bridges from the Big Apple. I’ve lived my entire adult life on Long Island. New York Metro, with all its beauties and drawbacks, is my place in the world.

     But New York Metro is part of the United States. It shares a great deal with the rest of the country. Not everything, no; for one thing, it’s a much more hectic environment than most of the rest of the country. For another, it’s more crowded, and in certain ways more demanding. And on those occasions when I’ve been compelled to be away from New York Metro, I’ve felt a certain psychological distance from those around me. Not a hostility, mind you; just that I and those around me at those times weren’t quite aligned the same way.

     I once had to spend six months away from Long Island on a contract engineering job. I never ceased to feel that distance, despite the best efforts of those I was working alongside and those who were guesting me to make me feel welcome. The sense of relief I felt upon returning to Long Island is indescribable. Long before I saw my own front door – even while my plane was still descending toward Kennedy Airport – I felt a profound sense of welcome and relief. I was home.

     Home doesn’t have to be the best place on Earth. It just has to be yours.

***

     For many today, home is word that lacks a firm referent. Oh, they have places to live. They’ve heaped up great mounds of possessions in those places. They know how to get there from just about anywhere else. But they don’t feel at home in the same way and to the same degree that I feel it.

     For some, it’s about having got here too recently. We do have a lot of immigrants. Some of them are even here legally. But when one is “come here” rather than “from here,” as New Englanders traditionally style the distinction, it takes time and an effort of will to transfer one’s allegiance. Some immigrants never manage it.

     Perhaps less time and effort are required of our internal migrants – the American-born who relocate from one state to another – but I’m sure some of each is still necessary. Some of them never manage it either. I’ve known people who’ve lived within a few miles of me for nearly forty years, but have never stopped thinking of themselves as Philadelphian, or Atlantan, or Angeleno. It comes out in their conversation, possibly without their knowledge.

     Such persons emit a profound sense of not being at home. It must make life difficult.

***

     I don’t think it’s about binding yourself to a place. I think it’s about deciding that you’re among your own. People you know and trust. People you don’t know, but you trust anyway – because they’ve been clustered around you for a long time, and thus in some extended sense are your own – more your own than the folks across the river or the folks on the other side of the mountain. You abstract your allegiance onto the locale, just for convenience of speech. But it’s the people of the locale, rather than its place on the map, that matter most.

     The more we move around, whatever our reason for doing so, the harder it is to form and maintain such an allegiance. When your home district begins to fill up with persons from other places – especially places where the norms and behavior differ greatly from what you know – it’s harder still. You sense that you’re no longer securely among your own. You might start to feel unsafe, threatened by the “come heres,” even if that threat should never be actualized.

     When I last wrote on this subject, I was concerned with international and intercontinental migrations that mix people who differ in several large ways: race, religion, culture, moral and ethical norms, standards for public conduct, and others. Such migrations have caused palpable, measurable harm. Many of the migrants don’t go to their destination locales from a desire to be there, but rather to batten upon the “from heres:” to become parasites on the locals’ prosperity and largesse. The destructive effects aren’t just legal or economic.

     I’m the shallowest of “from heres:” a first-generation American, born of immigrant parents. Perhaps I’m not the right person to discourse wisely or feelingly on the importance of being among one’s own. But I know the feeling. It’s surged up and torpedoed my several impulses to relocate. And I think perhaps that I should consider myself fortunate that it did. My Gentle Readers are free to imagine otherwise. And now, for some thematic music:

Jun 16 2023

Every flag officer in the US military needs to be fired

And this is exhibit 1,735,921 of why. This is not a serious officer. This is not an officer who cares about winning wars. And to be completely honest, she wasn’t selected to be a general based on the desire to win wars. She was selected because she toed the correct political line.

God help the troops under her command should it come to actual combat. I’m certain that the 69th Intersectional Dildo Brigade will fare just perfectly against the ChiComs or the Russians.

United States Space Force Lt. Gen. DeAnna M. Burt admitted during a recent Department of Defense (DoD) LGBTQ+ PRIDE event that she would allow access to “gender-affirming care” to take priority over qualifications when assigning officers.

Please don’t think that this pathetic hack of a military officer is an outlier. She’s not. During the Covidiacy, how many commanding officers resigned rather than push the clot shot on the troops? I can count two, one Marine and one Army. Every other officer fell in line like good little unthinking drones.

I was present for more than a few tele-conferences with higher HQ during the Covidiacy and the clot-shot mandates, and I can say that the officers cared more about having their illegal and immoral orders followed than they cared about the troops. Not one single officer on those calls thought to ask why there was such a massive push-back against the clot-shot. The common thought uttered was “How DARE those peons refuse my order!” Not a single person cared to ask why huge numbers of troops were saying “No”.

The US military has transitioned from a fighting force to a farce. People like me are gone, or they’re leaving. I was one of four people in my company who refused the clot shot. I retired. Two of them, a couple of high-speed low-drag warriors, are getting out even though the mandate was lifted. They won’t be a part of an organization that treats Soldiers in such a horrible fashion. And looking at the recruiting numbers, people like me but much younger are passing on the “opportunity” to be led by such stalwart examples of mental illness and political asskissing such as LTG Burt. Or woke, pathetic walking pieces of garbage like Gen. Milley, who cares more about sucking political dick than he does about winning wars.

A fish rots from the head. And until you get rid of the rot by firing the flag officers, nothing is going to improve.

Jun 16 2023

Finally! Official admission That the Ballots Can be Compromised

The official report from the GA election shows that it’s relatively easy to hack, modify software, and produce ballots whose barcodes do NOT match voters’ choices.

The exact scenario that the Left has been calling a paranoid conspiracy theory is proved to be not only possible, but doable in actual tests.

Jun 16 2023

Tucker And The Regime

     If there’s anyone in the Commentariat who should feel the crosshairs settling on his forehead, it’s Tucker Carlson.

     After Carlson’s inexplicable dismissal from FOX News, many of his regular viewers were worried about what would become of him. He was highly valued. He went as far as anyone in commercial media could in saying exactly what he thought. Commercial media, of course, must retain the good will of the licensing authorities to continue. As money is the prime determinant of commercial decision-making, even one as forthright as Carlson would know that his expression must abide by certain limits.

     But with no support from any commercial venture, Carlson is free to say what he likes. His most recent video production goes well beyond anything he would have been allowed to say on-air as a FOX News commentator:

     (Yes, I’ve downloaded it in case it’s “disappeared.”)

     There is no subtlety left in the struggle for power over us. Whistleblowers of several varieties have already been “removed.” You’ll hear little or nothing about that from the mainstream media. “Our representatives” in Congress won’t address their disappearances. They’re terrified of being made to follow them into the darkness. The Usurpers have decided that there are no longer any rules.

     Yet we sit here idle.

     The Republic isn’t just dead; it’s decayed to ashes. We may have the weapons and the skill we require, but we haven’t the will. The demonstration is before you.

As Matt Walsh has already noted, the Usurpers and their allies prioritize their targets according to those targets’ effectiveness. Tucker Carlson is very effective; that’s why the Usurpers coerced FOX into canning him. Oh, perhaps some high executives at FOX were in sympathy with the dismissal, but there’s no question that it has cost the corporation dearly and will continue to do so. Now that Carlson’s opinions are unconstrained by any corporate master, his effectiveness is rising to height no previous commentator has ever achieved. I hope someone is watching his back…someone on our side, that is.

     But no matter how well protected a man is, a Regime that’s determined to get him will manage to do so. It comes down to costs, in the extended sense:

  • Monetary cost;
  • Damage to key personnel;
  • Extent of any collateral damage;
  • Damage to the Regime’s public image;
  • Probability of an uprising against the Regime.

     Should the aggregate damage to the Regime rise to a height it finds worth the price of suppressing Carlson – or anyone else – it will “sign the check.” The destruction of lives, careers, and peripheral matters will be bounded only by whatever unknowable measure of self-restraint the Regime’s decision-makers possess.

     Keep the above list of factors in mind. Pray for Tucker Carlson and those he loves. The men who control the Usurper Regime are not known for allowing his degree of vocal opposition for very long.

Jun 16 2023

An Early-Morning Thought

     This comes from Father Paul Scalia:

     Armando Valladares was initially one of Fidel Castro’s supporters. He even got a job in the Office of the Ministry of Communications for the Revolutionary Government. But in 1960 things changed drastically. It happened that everybody else in his workplace had placed a I’m with Fidel sign on their desks. Doing so wasn’t officially required. But it was, you know, required. Valladares refused. He didn’t condemn or speak out against Castro. He simply declined to display the sign. For that simple refusal, he was sentenced to prison for 30 years. He spent 22 years in the worst conditions until his release and exile in 1982.

     I can almost hear the “Yeah, yeah, that’s old news” chorus from the less thoughtful persons in Liberty’s Torch’s readership. And in the naïve sense, it is old news. But let’s read on a bit before we go back to the sports pages:

     The story of Valladares comes to mind in the month of June. As the displays at stores, offices, and city hall proclaim, June is “Pride Month,” dedicated to the celebration of the LGBTQ+ community. Of course, people are free to celebrate whatever they want. That’s just a fact in a diverse society. But what happens to those who decline to celebrate Pride Month? Who don’t harbor any ill will but simply view human sexuality differently? Who don’t fly the flag – or put the sign on their desk?

     Many of you know the answer to that from your own experience. Many of you have suffered criticism and/or isolation among friends and at work because you don’t celebrate Pride Month, or don’t indicate your preferred pronouns, or don’t display the requisite signage. I’ve heard from many parishioners (and beyond) about the support for Pride Month that isn’t officially required at work. . .but, you know, is required. The intimidation at play indicates that at issue here is not the innocent pride that one might have in one’s children, or country, or a job well done. No, it’s the vicious variety, the pride that demands everyone’s approval.

     More relevant than you thought, isn’t it?

     I recall an anecdote about the reign of a certain Iosif Vissarionovich Dzughashvili over the now-defunct Union of Soviet Socialist Republics. You may know him better by his assumed “revolutionary” name of Joseph Stalin. Seems he was in the habit of giving speeches to various not-quite-voluntary audiences, stopping at random points in his oration, and watching to spy out anyone who might fail to applaud…or to applaud vigorously enough…or to applaud as long and loud as the rest. Should his eye settle upon such an individual, that unfortunate person’s life would end then and there. Applause to Stalin’s satisfaction wasn’t exactly required…but it was required all the same.

     Some wise man whose name I’ve lost has said that if you want to know who rules over you, ask whom you are forbidden to criticize. Today’s regime is even more demanding. You must applaud. You must attend the speeches and wear the pin. You must profess your unconditional devotion — and conspicuously, at that. There will be spot checks of your loyalty, Comrade. Be sure you know what’s expected and demanded of you…even if it isn’t exactly required. But what’s this? Did you fail to put your preferred pronouns in an email again?

     But do have a nice day.

Jun 15 2023

When They Realize They’ve Overplayed Their Hand

     …they immediately try to squelch conversation about it – “they” being the anti-American Left, of course. One aspect of that is the denigration of any group that coalesces around the salient they’ve misguidedly created. Such a group is in the news today:

     To its members, it’s a grassroots army of “joyful warriors” who “don’t co-parent with the government.”

     To anti-hate researchers, it’s a well-connected extremist group that attacks inclusion in schools.

     And to Republicans vying for the presidency, it has become a potential key partner in the fight for the 2024 nomination.

     There’s a clear giveaway of the intent of the AP “reporter” in those three sentences: Moms For Liberty is a “hate group.” And Republican-aligned, oh dear! But the smearing gets even more dramatic as you read into the article:

     The high interest in the event underscores how fights surrounding gender and race have become core issues for Republican voters. It also spotlights Republicans’ eagerness to embrace a group that has drawn backlash for spreading anti-LGBTQ+ ideas and stripping libraries and classrooms of diverse material….

     It has expanded its activism in local school districts to target books it says are inappropriate or “anti-American,” ban instruction on sexual orientation and gender identity, require teachers to disclose students’ pronouns to parents, and remove diversity, equity and inclusion programs from schools….

     Maurice Cunningham, a former political science professor at the University of Massachusetts-Boston who has tracked Moms for Liberty’s growth and relationships, said its ability to draw so many top Republican candidates to its second annual summit is a testament to its establishment support.

“Yes, there are certainly moms that live in their communities and so forth who are active,” Cunningham said. “But this is a top down, centrally controlled operation with big-money people at the top and political professionals working for them.”…

     Even as Moms for Liberty has aligned with establishment Republicans, researchers say its activism is part of a new wave of far-right anti-student inclusion efforts around the country.

     The Southern Poverty Law Center, which tracks hate and extremism around the country, designated Moms for Liberty as an “anti-government extremist” group in its annual report released last week, along with 11 other groups it said use parents’ rights as a vehicle to attack public education and make schools less welcoming for minority and LGBTQ+ students.

     The label comes after some of the group’s leaders and chapter chairs have been accused of harassing community members and amplifying false claims related to gender controversies….

     “They’re so loud and so aggressive that people are kind of scared into silence,” Defense of Democracy founder Karen Svoboda said of Moms for Liberty.

     The ironic part is how open is the hatred felt by the Left, the Southern Poverty Law Center, and the Democrat-handpuppet Associated Press toward Moms For Liberty. They want that group destroyed – a good indicator that the Moms are doing something effective.

     Matt Walsh, already a celebrated figure on the Right, said as much yesterday in one of his videos:

     As Walsh says in the above, the Left chooses its targets according to those targets’ effectiveness. A nationwide group with 120,000 members is plainly a force of high importance, especially since prominent politicians and other public figures are openly bidding for its support. Therefore, the word goes out: These people are dangerous to us. We must silence them by any means necessary. If we can’t shut them down completely, we must blacken their reputation. Call up our pet commentators and PR marionettes and give them urgent marching orders to that effect.

     And it is so.

     If you learn that you’ve been attacked by some important element of our ideological enemies, glory in it: you’re plainly doing something right. Minor players get little or no attention. By taking you on, they’ve said by implication that you are not minor.

     When I wrote this piece, it was out of the hope – not the certainty – that I was correct about the LGBTQ crap being the Left’s bridge too far. The AP smear piece cited here suggests that my hopes were not mistaken. Bang that drum whenever the moment is right, for their overreach has given us what’s perhaps our best weapon against them.

Jun 14 2023

Time to Put Vital Infrastructure In American Hands

Or, No Cheap $hit From China!

Now, there are times when cheap items are what you DO want:

  • Seasonal Dollar Tree stuff
  • Trinkets for Mardi Gras
  • Coffee filters, toilet paper, paper for school notes

But people in the USA are used to paying more for most of our consumables. We don’t blink at the cost of a good cappuchino, an excellent bourbon, or a truly awesome piece of steak.

The place where it is going to hurt is electronics. We need to get used to paying more for our technology. A LOT more.

Not the inexpensive netbooks or tablets. Not starter phones But the smartphones, good business and home networking computers, and vital infrastructure in our homes, businesses, and industries.

There, we need reliable products, and ones that are NOT open to intrusion by hackers or failure by poor quality.

I’ve been guilty in the past. I’ve not bought American, because in the items I need – basic electronic components, ham radios, and replacement parts – THERE IS NO AMERICAN-FROM-THE-BOTTOM-UP ALTERNATIVE.

MOST American manufacturers us at least some foreign-made components. And, even South Korean, Indian, and other Asian companies use some Chinese products.

Nursery rhyme found here.

“For Want of a Nail” Lyrics

For want of a nail the shoe was lost.
For want of a shoe the horse was lost.
For want of a horse the rider was lost.
For want of a rider the message was lost.
For want of a message the battle was lost.
For want of a battle the kingdom was lost.
And all for the want of a horseshoe nail.

Pity parents so seldom know, and teach their children, those foundational truths.

Jun 14 2023

Some Music To Lift Your Spirits

Neither I nor anyone else could say anything that would embellish or diminish this magnificent piece:

The Flower Kings have been erratic over the years, but this piece is one of the jewels in Prog-Rock’s crown.

Jun 14 2023

Is This What We Have Hoped For?

     “Upon occasion, the annelid completes a circuit.” — Piers Anthony

     When your enemy overplays his hand, it’s time to rejoice…and to counterattack:

     We may be pale shadows of what our ancestors were, but we can still rise to protect our kids.

     The recognition is swelling: The alphabet-people are Death Cultists. They are determined to have their way with our kids. Why? Because they can’t produce their own, of course! Their movement is biologically sterile. What they cannot make, they must steal.

     I could not have foreseen that their movement would penetrate this far before righteous reaction would set in. I’d have thought parental revulsion would manifest long before this. Yet here we are. Much damage has been done, but more can be prevented. Every parent in this land must rise to the occasion.

     School boards that refuse to expel the alphabet-groomers from the classroom must be evicted from their positions – physically if necessary. Colleges and universities that create “curricula” that glorify the alphabet-madness, regardless of its specific form, must be deprived of enrollees and funding. Private organizations dependent on our patronage, if they promote the “Pride” BS, must lose that patronage. And of course, public officials – elected or appointed – must be compelled to repudiate the “Pride” anti-gospel. The phrase of the hour is By Any Means Necessary.

     As the links above make plain, we’re already scoring victories. Some of those victories arose from the utter shock of the alphabet-activists that anyone would dare oppose them, especially children. And as good tacticians must, we must reinforce our successes. Action and money must pour into the effort in those places where the alphabet-activists are “on the back foot.” There must be no let-up.

     Our successes will embolden those who are with us but have feared to act. Others will rise to the occasion. Make this our clarion call:

     That’s all that need be said, really. You know what to do. Now do it.

Jun 13 2023

Yet Another Surgery Day

     Once again I must drive the C.S.O. a long distance for a surgical procedure, so I haven’t the time for a big essay today. However, I do have a quick thought to leave with you: Lawyer and author Harvey Silverglate posits in Three Felonies A Day that the complexity and obscurity of law today guarantees that a determined prosecutor could legitimately charge any of us with three felonies on any day of our adult lives. This gives special force to Lawrence Block’s semi-sarcastic witticism “It ain’t who you know, it’s what you’ve got on ‘em.” It also feels relevant to what the Establishment has been doing to deny President Trump all possibility of returning to the Oval Office. Add this striking report, consider the welter of “procedure crimes” written into federal law, and ask yourself: Did Trump enter high office aware that everything he would do – indeed, everything he had ever done – down to the most minuscule and innocent things, would be scrutinized in an attempt to ruin him?

     Have a nice day.

Jun 12 2023

You Are Not Special: A Defense Of Normality

     The early-morning hours often bring me to a strange place. It’s not a particularly comfortable place. Yet from that vantage point I can see things that are not apparent at other times, when time itself seems speeded up and a welter of necessities press. And being who and what I am, I’m moved to write about them.

***

     Among the besetting tragedies of our time is the belief, promulgated to legions of children by their well-meaning parents, that you are special. With vanishingly few exceptions, it is not so. Indeed, it has never been so, and will never be so. One who learns and accepts what the word special actually means can thresh that out for himself. It would be well if he were to do so before he’s old enough to vote, but a great many young persons do not – and therein lies the tragedy.

     Each of us is unique, but few of us are special.

     To be special is to be a standout: one who greatly exceeds the human norm in some way, and who therefore gets a lot of attention. The desire to be special equates to a desire to get that degree of attention from others. It’s a common desire. But the great majority of us simply don’t qualify.

     Fortunately for our race, general competence at living is widespread. You don’t need to be special to achieve a worthy, comfortable life, at least in a First World nation. Yes, you’ll have to work. That work could be irritating, or strenuous, or boring, depending on what you choose for your trade. But once again with few exceptions, you’ll be good enough at it to pay your bills, usually with a modest margin for savings.

     The Special do much more than that. Their deeds have wide and deep impacts. The attention they get underscores their contrast with us Normals. And a great many of us are consumed by envy of them. That envy can get in the way of achieving a worthy, comfortable life.

***

     It’s common for young people who are “locally special” – i.e., the best at something within a limited community – to experience great chagrin once they go out into the wider world. Suddenly they’re surrounded by other “locally specials,” and in that company their distinction ceases to distinguish them. The discovery can be devastating. In its throes, the young person aching from the loss of his “specialness” can slip into all sorts of pathologies. Some can last lifelong.

     The desire to be special doesn’t have to be crippling to those who haven’t got a world-beater gift. There are several kinds of “locally special” status available to any decent man. Being a beloved spouse or parent is one; being a “go-to guy” in your occupation, valued for your promptness, thoroughness, and reliability, is another; being a greatly trusted friend is still another. These limited forms of specialness are what make human life endurable for the great majority of men.

     Does this all seem too obvious, Gentle Reader? If so, I shan’t be offended if you choose to surf away. As I said, these early-morning hours find me in some very strange states of mind, where much that eludes me at other times of day becomes clear. But if it’s really all that obvious, why are so many people who have worthy, comfortable lives within their grasp so bloody miserable?

***

     It seems time for a quote:

     The world of reality has limits; the world of imagination is boundless. Not being able to enlarge the one, let us contract the other; for it is from their differences that the evils arise which render us unhappy. – Jean Jacques Rousseau

     Rousseau, not an admirable figure in his own right, nevertheless said some wise things. The above is one of them. The man who learns to constrain his desires such that they fit within his means has the very best chance of achieving enduring happiness. Here, means should not be interpreted in the narrow economic sense. It should be taken to include one’s complete package of abilities and limitations.

     Aspirations of any sort are always conditional. “I want to be an astronaut!” “I want to be a pro baseball player!” “I want to be a great inventor!” These are all very well, provided we suffix each of them with “…if I can.” For of that, there are no guarantees.

***

     Just as we cannot guarantee an ascent to big-time specialness, neither can we guarantee that every moment of our lives will be brilliantly illuminated, vibrantly special. Even the truly Special know a great deal of ordinariness, days of humdrum, drudgery, and tiring effort. Thomas Edison captured it perfectly in his epigram: “Genius is two percent inspiration and ninety-eight percent perspiration.” On another occasion, he said that “Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.” He would surely know.

     One of my favorite movies, A Thousand Clowns, has something piercing to say about “ordinary life.” Central character Murray Burns has rebelled against the working world. Its ordinariness repelled him; he has adopted deliberate unemployment and its limitations in a quest to make every day special:

     “I was sitting in the express looking out the window same as every morning watching the local stops go by in the dark with an empty head and my arms folded, not feeling great and not feeling rotten, just not feeling, and for a minute I couldn’t remember, I didn’t know, unless I really concentrated, whether it was a Tuesday or a Thursday… or a … for a minute it could have been any day, Arnie… sitting in the train going through any day… in the dark through any year… Arnie, it scared the hell out of me.”…

     “I gotta know what day it is. I gotta know what’s the name of the game and what the rules are without anyone else telling me. You gotta own your own days and name ’em, each one of ’em, every one of ’em, or else the years go right by and none of them belong to you. And that ain’t just for weekends, kiddo.”

     In a brilliant climactic scene, Murray confronts his conventionally successful brother Arnold, who works in a high-rise office as an advertising executive. Murray is facing the possible loss of his young nephew Nick to the “Social Services,” and is struggling with whether he can return to the existence he fled. Arnold exemplifies what he shuns and as such is a curiously dualistic character whom Murray loves yet often strives to reject. Yet Arnold knows something Murray does not – and he expresses it in one of the best short soliloquies in all of cinema:

     “I have a wife and I have children, and business, like they say, is business. I am not an exceptional man, so it is possible for me to stay with things the way they are. I’m lucky. I’m gifted. I have a talent for surrender. I’m at peace. But you are cursed; and I like you so it makes me sad, you don’t have the gift; and I see the torture of it. All I can do is worry for you. But I will not worry for myself; you cannot convince me that I am one of the Bad Guys. I get up, I go, I lie a little, I peddle a little, I watch the rules, I talk the talk. We fellas have those offices high up there so we can catch the wind and go with it, however it blows. But, and I will not apologize for it, I take pride; I am the best possible Arnold Burns.”

     Arnold has unwittingly undervalued himself, for his is clearly a worthy life. He’s valued greatly by those around him, including rebellious Murray. Without him, Murray would flounder indefinitely, and eventually would sink into despair. By elucidating what he has called “a talent for surrender,” he’s brought home the reality of life to his willful brother: You can’t have everything exactly as you want it at all times. This is particularly the case if you want things that others must provide you.

***

     So there it is: you are not special, and that’s quite all right. (Apologies to any of the genuinely Special who might be reading this.) Rare is the man who is so far above the norms that he can have everything exactly as he wants it: wealth, fame, the love and companionship of the beautiful, the adulation of millions, what have you. The Special get a lot of popular attention; indeed, in the usual case they get a lot more than they actually want. That’s the downside of their estate. For my part, I’m inexpressibly glad that I’m not one of them.

     Normality is not a curse. Be not consumed by envy of others who seem to have what you do not, for they too have their crosses to bear. Glory in your normal, worthy, comfortable life. And do have a nice day.

Jun 11 2023

Authoritarians Have Sped Up Their Agenda

A pattern has developed that few who frequent here would dispute.

Aside from deadly jabs, what else can readers see on the near or far horizen?

Jun 11 2023

Corpus Christi Sunday 2023

     Many American dioceses celebrate this feast, that of the Body and Blood of Christ, on the Sunday that follows Trinity Sunday, rather than on Thursday as is traditional. So it’s worth a few more words about this celebration, and the specific doctrine that underlies it.

     Corpus Christi concerns one of the Church’s most contested teachings: that of Transubstantiation: i.e., that in every consecrated Host and chalice of consecrated wine, there inheres the Real Presence of Jesus Christ. The unleavened bread is transubstantiated into His flesh; the wine is transubstantiated into His blood. Note the use of the word transubstantiated rather than “transformed.” To transform something is to change its form, not its substance. The form of the Host and the wine remain as they were before consecration; it’s their substance, normally invisible to the senses, that changes.

     Therefore, at every Mass performed by an ordained priest, a miracle occurs.

     That teaching was one driver of the Protestant Schism. Some of the schismatic denominations nevertheless returned to the teaching in later years. Among the teachings a catechumen is required to accept, it’s high among those that have daunted or defeated them.

     Sad to say, even many who claim to be Catholics doubt the reality of Transubstantiation. Yet there have been many miracles, well confirmed by the Church’s investigators, that testify to its soundness. A highly readable book, Joan Carroll Cruz’s Eucharistic Miracles, describes the ones that have been most confidently verified. One that may have occurred recently in Connecticut is under investigation as we speak.

     Skeptics often ask: Why are some who doubt afforded miracles that dispel those doubts, while God permits others to continue in their disbelief? Isn’t it more likely that these “miracles” are fraudulent? And if that’s the case, isn’t it evidence for dismissing the entire Christian story as a fraud?

     I don’t claim to know God’s mind. I sorrow for those who want to believe but are too afflicted with doubt, whether of this teaching or of any other, to “make the leap.” But I believe that He gives each of us what we need, when our need is greatest. As for the miracles themselves, the last thing the Church could afford is to present fraudulent acts to the world as authentic miracles. That’s why the Church established the Congregation for the Causes of Saints to investigate all miraculous claims with the most scrupulous eyes.

     I strongly recommend Joan Carroll Cruz’s little book, especially on this day that’s specifically dedicated to the Transubstantiation. If you’re already Catholic, it will exalt you and move you to praiseful prayer. If you’re not…well, you’ll just have to try it and see, won’t you?

     May God bless and keep you all.

Jun 11 2023

Headline Writer Lacks All Critical Sense

     Film at eleven? All right, I suppose that’s too tongue-in-cheek even for me. Still, this headline (and the article that follows) got me shaking my head:

     NASA to voyage to ‘golden asteroid’ worth $10,000 quadrillion this fall

     $10,000 quadrillion? $1019? Even in 2023 dollars, that’s a whole lotta bread. But what, precisely, does the assertion mean? How did the writer arrive at it, and what is its practical significance?

     Well, it seems 16 Psyche, the asteroid that NASA plans to decorate with its own man-made satellite, is believed to contain a great deal of gold, platinum, and other precious metals. The amounts involved are estimated to dwarf the quantities of those elements Mankind has succeeded in extracting from the Earth’s crust. But somehow, I can’t see that huge dollar figure as meaningful in any sense. Here’s why.

     If the $10,000 quadrillion figure were based solely on the quantity of gold believed to be in 16 Psyche, at current market rates that would amount to 5*1015 Troy ounces of gold. In a more comprehensible form, that would be about 1.6*1014 kilograms, or 1.6*1011 metric tons: 160 billion metric tons of gold.

     Now for some important comparison figures: In all of history,

     The price of gold depends almost entirely on its scarcity here on Earth. Yes, it’s also valued for its beauty, and for its uses in engineering. But if the Earthly supply of gold were more than fifty times as large as the supply of iron ore, it would be valued at less than the value of a chunk of iron – far less.

     Note that the article cited in the first paragraph has not caused the world price of gold to collapse. It hasn’t even fluttered.

     But we’re not done yet. Price is determined by scarcity only when one is speaking of “resources:” i.e., things with which we hope to make or purchase other things, but which are normally not valued by end users for any other reason. For example, I greatly value the plumbing in my house; it provides me with running water on demand. But I would not therefore want to acquire raw iron or raw copper for my own purposes. I value the pipes for their utility, not for the elements from which they’re made.

     So the $10,000 quadrillion figure is absurd in more than one way. Not only would gold be nearly valueless if there were that much of it available on Earth; also, it would no longer be honored as a medium of exchange. The current Gross World Product is less than $100 trillion – only 0.002% of that absurd gold valuation. Yet all the gold believed to be in 16 Psyche, if it were brought to Earth, would suffice to purchase nothing. No one would be willing to exchange something people actually want or need for a chunk of gold, any more than one could buy a hamburger for chunk of iron ore.

     But top editors allow the creation of pointless “gee whiz” headlines (and equally pointless stories) because they “pull in the eyeballs.” So the practice, like Survivor, America’s Got Talent, and Real Housewives of New Jersey, will continue unabated.

Jun 11 2023

Maybe It’s The Proximity Of All That Saltwater

     …but whatever the actual cause, California appears to have gone “off the rails.” For an appetizer, there’s this:

     A recently amended California bill would add “affirming” the sexual transition of a child to the state’s standard for parental responsibility and child welfare—making any parent who doesn’t affirm transgenderism for their child guilty of abuse under California state law….

     AB 957 post-amendment “would include a parent’s affirmation of the child’s gender identity as part of the health, safety, and welfare of the child,” altering the definition and application of the entire California Family Code.

     California courts would be given complete authority under Section 3011 of California’s Family Code to remove a child from his or her parents’ home if parents disapprove of LGBTQ+ ideology.

     How is that not the erection of a political standard for parenting? Indeed, how is it not the institution of a California state-enforced religion? But wait: there’s more!

     A new law in California will force those who make more money to pay more for their electricity.

     Under the new rules, higher-income earners will pay seven times more than low-income earners.

     CNET reported:

     If you live in California, how much you pay for electricity will soon be tied to much you earn. A state law passed last summer requires the California Public Utilities Commission, or CPUC, to approve a pricing structure that incorporates a flat fee with a sliding scale based on income.

     Currently, Californians pay for the energy they use and the cost of upgrading the grid, settling lawsuits related to wildfires and providing assistance to low-income customers is built into the per-kilowatt-hour price.

     Under the new system, however, funds for these programs would come from “income-graduated fixed charges.”

     It’s an unprecedented move: In an April blog post, energy economist Ahmad Faruqui said more than 170 investor-owned utilities nationwide incorporate a fixed rate — the median being $10 and the highest $40.

     None has an income-based component.

     This is 200-proof Marxian socialism.

     I shall repeat my recommendation of a few days ago. But in light of these suggestions, perhaps it should be strengthened. I’ll be back to this.

Jun 10 2023

Reality And Its Detractors

     In this universe, which is kept running by the often invisible operation of inviolable natural laws, we can observe various kinds of order. Natural order – the reliability of various cause-and-effect relations – is what makes life possible. Men use their knowledge of those relations to organize their activities in pursuit of sustenance and security. If all were chaos, life could not endure.

     In June of 2002, back at the old, deeply lamented Palace Of Reason, I posted an essay that was first to use the title of this one. It appears in full below.

     Ever since Bishop Berkeley, there have been “thinkers” claiming that “reality” is an empty concept, and that the Universe is whatever we choose to believe it is. When asked his opinion of Berkeley’s thesis, Samuel Johnson said, “I refute it thus,” and kicked a cobblestone. No better refutation has ever been offered, nor is one needed.

     Today we have new forms of the subjectivist madness, including that darling of the academic world, deconstructionism, by whose tenets it is impossible for me to convey an idea to you with any reliability, because of the fuzziness of the meanings of words and their variable interpretability by you, the reader. One would think that, if the deconstructionists believed this sincerely, they would refrain from preaching it at us.

     How has subjectivism held on in men’s minds for so long? No attempt to act on its premises has ever succeeded. Even attempting to argue for them involves the unwitting use of the objectivist premise that reality is independent of our opinions about it. When you can’t help using your opponent’s postulates in your argument, you’re in real trouble.

     Since any attempt to reject the laws of Nature is inherently self-defeating and ultimately humiliating, we must ask why so much of it occurs. Men are not programmed to seek their own denigration or destruction, so, when we encounter one that appears to be doing so, we tend to classify him as dysfunctional, an aberration. Well, why are there so many dysfunctional aberrations about?

     Berkeley himself claimed to be developing the ideas of Plato to their ultimate conclusions; indeed, he called his thesis idealism, which was Plato’s counterpoise to Aristotelian essentialism, the doctrine of an objective reality. (Obviously, Berkelian idealism has nothing to do with colloquial idealism, the devotion to a high principle and willingness to sacrifice for its advancement or defense.) Platonic idealism was rooted in Plato’s assertion that abstract concepts are prior and superior to material objects; that “horseness” comes before “horse.” He elevated the conceptual faculties of Man above the metaphysically given objective world. He’s been dead a long time, so it would be hard to determine why.

     A great part of the reason for subjectivism’s survival, indeed for its grip on the minds of many in academe, is that its proponents are under no obligation to live by their creed. A good thing for them! Academe has long had this property. It’s a protected space, in which we tolerate a great deal of nonsensical word-slinging, in the hope that a nugget of real wisdom will emerge now and then. And if you feel that the interval between “now” and “then” is getting to be substantial, well, you’re not alone.

     Another part of the reason is that advancing ideas in line with the major assumptions of ordinary men is no way to notoriety. To become widely known, one must contradict the prevailing wisdom, and the more dramatically, the better. Obviously, there are limits; no one who opined that the Earth is flat would get much of a hearing today. But remember that Columbus’s and Magellan’s assertions that the Earth is a globe raised them to prominence precisely because they flew in the face of conventional wisdom. It also helped that they were able to demonstrate their claims.

     Finally, there’s this: A lot of academics espouse insane ideas because they hate normal people. Consider: Except for the hard sciences, an academic’s sphere of influence is likely to extend no further than the few hundred students and professors he interacts with over the course of his career. He’ll be paid reasonably well — very well indeed, for a man who does such unproductive work — but riches will forever elude him. The average white-collar worker, if he applies himself and takes care to keep his skills up to date, will zoom past him in both material accomplishments and impact on the world before they both turn forty — and the academic knows it.

     Envy, that most destructive of all emotions, is always founded on self-hatred. To hate another, one must first hate oneself.

     For those of us who believe that ideas are tools for living, hopefully for living well, there is no hazard in believing that the world around us is what it appears to be. (An exception will be made in the presence of David Copperfield.) There is a hazard in allowing the subjectivists and deconstructionists to rampage unchallenged through the realm of thought: impressionable young people might take them seriously and do themselves harm before they realize they’ve been taken in by credentialed con men.

     This essay is my contribution toward your efforts to protect those you love. At the first sign of subjectivist infection, administer it at full strength. Repeat as necessary. If the symptoms persist, drop me a note.

     The above is a somewhat wordy statement that can be boiled down into three little words: What is, is. No one can alter a fact simply by believing otherwise. Alternately, we have this homely saying: “If wishes were fishes, we’d all cast nets.” My rants about “should” are merely variations on that theme.

     Today there exists a huge phenomenon dedicated to a counterpoised proposition: We can have what we want, even if it’s impossible, if we can just silence everyone who contradicts it. The common name for this phenomenon is political correctness. Its promoters seldom call it that, of course; to do so is to undermine the campaign to enforce it everywhere.

     Even those who promote political correctness (henceforward, PC) are aware, though perhaps only dimly, that silencing their opponents changes nothing. The silencings themselves are of value to them. The reasons have been brilliantly expressed by Theodore Dalrymple:

     Political correctness is communist propaganda writ small. In my study of communist societies, I came to the conclusion that the purpose of communist propaganda was not to persuade or convince, nor to inform, but to humiliate; and therefore, the less it corresponded to reality the better. When people are forced to remain silent when they are being told the most obvious lies, or even worse when they are forced to repeat the lies themselves, they lose once and for all their sense of probity. To assent to obvious lies is to co-operate with evil, and in some small way to become evil oneself. One’s standing to resist anything is thus eroded, and even destroyed. A society of emasculated liars is easy to control. I think if you examine political correctness, it has the same effect and is intended to.

     Intimidating and humiliating those who dare to note the Emperor’s nakedness is the point. Why else persecute persons who note obvious facts? The facts themselves cannot be made “unfacts.” They’re observable by anyone who dares to look. Subjugating those who fail to go along with PC’s assertions is the whole point. That’s the route to absolute and unbounded power.

     Yes, it would be an Empire of Lies. “In an Empire of Lies, only a crazy man speaks the truth,” wrote Andrew Klavan, and he is quite correct. The Empire will focus its wrath upon such a man. It will break him as surely as the Sun rises in the east. It must, for its dominance depends wholly upon not being contradicted.

     Dominance, not the actual alteration of any particular fact, is the goal.

***

     There are quite a lot of facts against which the Left is on campaign. Allow me to enumerate a few:

  1. No one can change his sex.
  2. Unborn children are as human as you and I.
  3. Preteen children are grievously harmed by sexualization.
  4. Male homosexuality is destructive of its practitioners’ health.
  5. Except before the law, where we must be equal, we are all unequal.
  6. Therapy to reorient homosexuals to heterosexuality sometimes works.
  7. Socialism leads to the impoverishment of the many for the power of a few.
  8. Few differences among the races, the sexes, or the ethnicities are due to oppression.
  9. Changing the name of a thing does not change the thing itself, nor any of its characteristics.
  10. While geniuses have sometimes tended bar, that does not mean that all bartenders are geniuses.

     To say any of these things openly is to risk the PC hammer wielded in all its fury. Yet not to say them is to accede passively to the rise of totalitarianism and all that follows in its train. It follows that good men have a moral duty to proclaim what they know to be true, especially when the demonstrations are available to anyone who cares to look and is willing to see. It also follows that when a good man comes under the hammer, it’s the moral duty of other good men to rally to his aid.

     The reluctance of decent persons to rally to the beleaguered speaker of truth is among the most shameful aspects of our current milieu. It indicates that we lack the courage that makes every other virtue real.

***

     The above may seem disconnected from any of the “hot topics” in today’s news. I make no apology for that; rather than address any one of them, I preferred to address all of them. For they are united in this: the evils they produce arise directly from attempts to deny reality and to silence those who defend it.

     For a change, there is a “last graf:”

Stand up for reality.
Speak truth regardless of the cost.
Give the proper coloration to those who would silence you.

     Have a nice day.

Jun 10 2023

There Are Days

     Indeed, there are whole geological epochs. But I digress.

     This morning, given the chaotic mess into which our nation has descended – what, you didn’t think stolen elections would have consequences? – I found myself in the mood for some Kipling:

Macdonough’s Song / Rudyard Kipling

Whether the State can loose and bind
     In Heaven as well as on Earth:
If it be wiser to kill mankind
     Before or after the birth–
These are matters of high concern
     Where State-kept schoolmen are;
But Holy State (we have lived to learn)
     Endeth in Holy War.

Whether The People be led by The Lord,
     Or lured by the loudest throat:
If it be quicker to die by the sword
     Or cheaper to die by vote–
These are things we have dealt with once,
     (And they will not rise from their grave)
For Holy People, however it runs,
     Endeth in wholly Slave.

Whatsoever, for any cause,
     Seeketh to take or give
Power above or beyond the Laws,
     Suffer it not to live!
Holy State or Holy King–
     Or Holy People’s Will–
Have no truck with the senseless thing.
     Order the guns and kill!
          Saying –after–me:–

Once there was The People–Terror gave it birth;
Once there was The People and it made a Hell of Earth
Earth arose and crushed it. Listen, O ye slain!
Once there was The People–it shall never be again!

     (From when men wrote actual poetry, with rhyme, meter, and substance, rather than whiny, self-indulgent, free-verse crap.)

Jun 09 2023

Day Off

     Forgive me, Gentle Reader. I’m utterly exhausted. I need some time away from this monstrosity. Anyway, this morning there’s only one story that really matters, and there are plenty of able commentators to address it. So be well, and check back tomorrow.

Jun 08 2023

Something You Might Not Have Realized

     As the official school year dribbles out to its close, school-age kids are celebrating in anticipation of their summer vacations. What will they do with their time off? Well, when I was in that age band, I was sent to spend the summer on my wealthy aunt’s country estate in Dutchess County, where I functioned as unpaid manual labor. I hope today’s school-age kids do better.

     But the approach of the summer vacation period is of less moment than the termination of the current phase of the “twelve-year sentence.” Most parents, sad to say, never ponder the ten-month removal of their children from their lives: what good it does them; whether it’s truly necessary to prepare their kids for adulthood; and why on Earth the “public schools” have embraced so much that is lunatic and openly destructive. John Dewey, one of the early luminaries of “public education” – two words, two lies – once made it quite explicit:

     Didn’t know that, did you, Gentle Reader? This supposed “educator,” through whose classes the great majority of teachers-to-be passed for several decades, was rabidly anti-individualist, anti-Christian, and anti-family. His vision of the schools was to function as antagonist to those things, along with whatever actual knowledge might be conveyed to its inmates for form’s sake. Viewed in that light, the determination of the “progressives” to control the schools absolutely is easily understood.

     A more recent writer of more wholesome values and convictions put the following into the mouth of a “progressive” baron in his first novel:

     “We’re going to tie together all the states and their educational systems to a single set of curricular standards, and we’ll require homeschooled students meet the same standards. We’re going to mandate testing to exactly quantify student performance to be sure no child gets left behind and identify problem schools and problem teachers.”
     I was confused. “That sounds like a good thing,” I noted. “Quantify performance and hold public schools accountable for their failures.”
     Uncle Larry smiled smugly. “Oh, it is, but you should never consider a policy based only on its first-order effects. You have to look past that at the second-order consequences, too. Teachers will be evaluated on their performance based on how well their students do on their tests. So, what will happen?”
     “They will be motivated to do their best to do a good job teaching their students.” It still wasn’t making sense to me.
     “They will spend all their time teaching students how to optimize test scores to the exclusion of anything outside the officially approved curriculum, making sure they stay precisely focused on the officially sanctioned lessons,” Uncle Larry clarified. “But, that’s not the real benefit.”
     “I still don’t get it,” I confessed. “What happens when they run out of time? When they are already teaching their poor little hearts out, and their students’ test scores are still questionable, and the raise they were hoping for isn’t going to happen unless their students become more proficient?” I was still drawing a blank.
     Uncle Larry enlightened me. “They are going to assign homework to their students: enough homework to guarantee that even elementary school students are spending all their spare time doing homework. Their poor parents, eager to see that Junior stays up with the rest of the class, will be spending all their time helping their kids get incrementally more proficient on the tests we have designed. They’ll be too busy doing homework to pick up on any anti-social messages at home.”
     “Homework in elementary school?” The notion seemed ridiculous to me. Except for the occasional project, I didn’t even begin to get homework until I was in ninth grade or so. Even now, in high school, I was usually able to complete all my homework in spare moments while in other classes or during breaks.
     “Of course it seems peculiar to you,” Uncle Larry acknowledged. “You’re not accustomed to it, but it’s coming: slowly, gradually, bit by bit, until parents and children alike are used to the concept and take it for granted.”
     That sounded spooky. It reminded me of Dad’s parable of the frogs in the slowly boiling water. I carefully kept my unease off my face and focused on looking interested and engaged.
     “Children will be too busy to learn independence at home,” Uncle Larry continued, “too busy to do chores, to learn how to take care of themselves, to be responsible for their own cooking, cleaning, and laundry. Their parents will have to cater to their little darlings’ every need, and their little darlings will be utterly dependent on their parents. When the kids grow up, they will be used to having someone else take care of them. They will shift that spirit of dependence from their parents, to their university professors, and ultimately to their government. The next generation will be psychologically prepared to accept a government that would be intrusive even by today’s relaxed standards – a government that will tell them exactly how to behave and what to think. Not a Big Brother government, but a Mommy-State….”
     “Eventually, we may even outlaw homeschooling as antisocial, like our more progressive cousins in Germany already do,” he noted. “Everyone must know their place in society and work together for social good, not private profit.”

     How much of that rings true to you, Gentle Reader? Measure it, however you please, against what your kids are actually being “taught” ten months per year, and the degree to which their schooling separates them from your tutelage and influence. Does schooling as it’s practiced today seem more in line with true, practical education or with the goals expressed in the snippet above?

     There’s little point in beating this into the magma layer. Either you get it or you don’t. The pernicious nature of government-run schooling is already on open display as the “progressives” force ever more madness into the “curricula.” Left-wing activists of every kind have free access to the schoolroom. Kids are being pilloried for daring to assert that there are only two sexes. God help those that fail to “volunteer” for the latest protest march, or that come to school wearing a “Make America Great Again” T-shirt or cap. And of course “educators’ unions” in all fifty states are doing their damnedest to make it impossible for even the best-educated parents to homeschool their kids.

     Get them out now, before you lose them forever.

     (Applause to our newest Co-Conspirator for the Dewey graphic.)

Jun 08 2023

Let me tell you about James

James was born the eldest of nine kids in a Irish Catholic family. James’ dad was in the Navy, and James just happened to be born in 1940, so his dad was gone quite a bit of the time trying to teach bad people the consequences of their actions. James excelled at running, winning countless meets as a high schooler, and then holding state records in the one-mile an two-mile events when he attended college. When there’s nine kids in the family and your mom calls out “DINNER TIME!” you make sure you’re the first one to the table, because that’s a situation of “The Quick and The Hungry”.

After college, James decided that he wanted a vacation, so he joined Uncle Sam’s Misguided Children, and was commissioned as a Second Lieutenant. Since being an officer in the USMC wasn’t hard enough, he took up running marathons as a hobby. That lasted until knee surgery in his 60’s. After that he took up bike riding and competed in several races, because those damn kids needed to be put in their place.

At one point while he was stationed in Norfolk, VA, he injured his ankle. This is important because while swimming in a pool as part of his recovery, he was hit on by a female life guard who thought he looked cute. They got married about three years later. They had two boys, much to his great surprise. James once told me that if he had known that sex led to kids, he would have just joined the priesthood and remained celibate. I believed him when he said this.

James did two tours in Viet Nam. It was not a fun time. That’s all that needs to be said about that.

After twenty two years of service, James figured it was time to be called “Mister”, so he retired and went back to school. He worked in the computer industry in a time when MS DOS was the king of operating systems. Along the way he did his best to instill honor, work ethics and integrity into his two boys. It stuck. One went on to join the service, and the other ended up becoming the President of the company that he had started working for decades ago just to pay a few bills.

James was diagnosed with cancer around 2014. He informed his family of this by titling his email “Well, damn”. He successfully fought it off twice. But when the Covidiacy made the medical establishment lose its collective mind, things got a little out of hand, and cancer started winning. James’ two boys spent countless hours at the family home making sure that James and his wife were taken care of, and that James would be able to live life as he wanted to live it. He spent the last part of his life on his property, looking out at the forest that he loved and surrounded by family that he loved and who loved him. Have you heard the joke “An Introvert is someone who, when a pandemic happens, doesn’t notice a change in their lifestyle”? That was James. All he needed was his wife, his sons, and a couple of his Marine Corps League buddies.

James lost his battle with cancer today. He died with his wife of over fifty years by his side, and his younger son praying the rosary at his bedside every morning.

He taught me how to drive. How to run a chainsaw and fell a tree. He taught me the joy in laughing. Jokes and practical jokes and how poking fun at a problem makes the problem easier to deal with. He taught me that freedom and responsibility are both sides of the same coin. He hammered a work ethic into me. When I first enlisted, he was the officer who swore me in. That picture remains in the dining room to this day, because that’s how proud of me he was. He raised me and mentored me and guided me, and as his health failed I did everything I could to return what he did for me in service to him, to make sure he didn’t ever get put into a nursing home.

He was a prickly perfectionist. When I was a teen I got t-boned by a driver who had ran a red light. He got pissed off at me for not looking both ways a fourth or fifth time. I can say that a lot of my unhealthy mental habits come from him. The perfectionism. Taking the blame for things because if somehow, somewhere if I had done some thing that I wasn’t aware of I could have made X or Y happen.

But he built the parts of me that are the best. The integrity. The ability to stand my ground when I’m right, and to acknowledge my mistakes when I’m wrong. The ability to just get the job done, because dammit that’s what a proper man does.

I’m going to miss him. And maybe if I live a good enough life, I’ll get to see him again.

Load more