The Eyes May Not Have It…

     …but they want it:

     Dog owners know those eyes. We face them daily, usually at dinnertime but often at lunchtime as well. And take it from me, Gentle Reader: those eyes are compelling. I once had to stop the C.S.O. from setting a place and filling a plate for our Newf Joy – and we were having a salad.

     It simply doesn’t matter. If you’re eating it, they want it. And if you’re a softie about animals, they’ll usually get a little of it. Not that that’s a bad thing, mind you. Just remember: no chocolate!

     Enough of the news for one blessed day. My day away from such things was more refreshing than I could have expected. So let’s make this a non-news piece.

     Medical practices have been changing, and not for the better. The C.S.O. was having an unusual amount of trouble breathing normally last week, so she decided to take it to our doctor. But when she rang the practice for an appointment, she faced an interrogation. The receptionist wouldn’t schedule her without a clean COVID-19 test, an assurance that she hasn’t been in contact with any birds, and satisfactory answers to two dozen other rather intrusive questions.

     That’s right, Gentle Reader: a doctor’s office wouldn’t agree to see her if she might be sick.

     What business are doctors in, please? I seem to have missed a recent change.

     Well, the local “doc in a box” saw her immediately, diagnosed her ailment, and prescribed the appropriate medication. As of this morning, she’s on the mend. But it’s unclear whether she’ll ever go back to “our family physician.” The group practice of which she’s part seems uninterested in the practice of medicine.

     There are many scammers out there, as I’m sure you’re all aware. The more blatant ones will attempt to convince you that you’re in arrears to the IRS, or that your computer has a virus that they detected from afar, or that you’ve been named as the legatee to some dead Nigerian prince, or what have you. Over time most people have been sensitized to them and avoid interacting with them.

     But there’s some evidence that the scammers are evolving. Their targeting is becoming sophisticated. As a self-published novelist, I get solicitations from “publishers” and “promoters” that promise to make my book (which they haven’t read) a best-seller. Never mind that I’ve published nineteen novels, or that the one the scammer has cited is a middle volume in a series. Just send us $X and we’ll make you and your book famous!

     Recently I found a way to extract some amusement from what would otherwise be a nuisance. When the most recent “promoter” had finished his pitch, I launched into mine:

FWP: All right, I’ll sign up with you—
Scammer: Great! I guarantee you won’t be sorry—
FWP: But I have a condition first. Do you have a PayPal account?
Scammer: Yes…
FWP: Great! Here’s mine: (gives PayPal email address). Now send me one dollar.
Scammer: Why?
FWP: Because once you’ve done that, I’ll have what I need to make you famous. Do you still want to do business with me?
Scammer: (Disconnects)

     Funny how well that worked!

     Winters in the Northeast are seldom dry. Whether it’s snow or rain, we usually get a lot of it in the cold months. But not this year. One consequence has been serious trouble with brushfires. There was a big one out on Long Island’s East End just two days ago.

     While the East End isn’t as heavily built-up as Queens, heavy vehicles such as fire trucks and ambulances can find it challenging to get around out there. The neighborhoods are among the oldest on Long Island, and their roads aren’t the best. There have been reports that traffic on those roads impeded the progress of emergency vehicles. In all probability, old neighborhoods in other parts of the Northeast have similar conditions to cope with.

     Just a brief public-service pitch: Make way for emergency vehicles. Lives could be at stake.

     Daylight Savings Time and the twice-yearly changing of the clocks have a lot of people unsettled. There was once a rationale for it, deriving from agricultural practices. However, the plants and farm animals I’ve interviewed profess indifference to it, so there’s no good reason to maintain it. I recall that during his first term, President Trump suggested doing away with it.

     Can we get some action on this, please? That hour of lost sleep has begun to mean a lot to my old carcass. And that’s to say nothing about what it does to Sunday Mass. I mean, it’s understandable that the congregation should be a bit thin on Spring-Ahead Sunday, but when the celebrant shows up an hour late, you’ve got a problem!

     The militant anti-religionists are beginning to swarm again. They made a sally around the Christmas season, then fell silent for a couple of months. But here we are at the beginning of the Lenten season, and they’re back in their battle gear.

     I’m used to the ones that attack faith itself. They’re easy to dismiss. But the current wrinkle is to attack religious institutions – “organized religion,” in their terms. One just yesterday tried to tell me that being a participating member of a Christian religious organization is “pointless.”

     He didn’t have an argument. He just repeated himself. But about what other kind of involvement would he have said that?

     Christian religious organizations are the most effective practitioners of true charity in the world. They provide companionship to the sick and the elderly, material aid to the destitute, and solace to the beleaguered and bereaved. That’s above and beyond the administration of the sacraments and the fellowship of a like-minded group of believers. There’s immense satisfaction in being an active participant in such things.

     “Pointless?” I wish all my involvements were that “pointless!”

     That’s all for the nonce, Gentle Reader. I may be back later if I get a bee in my bonnet, but for now, be well.